斯蒂芬森/E.S.Stephenson
What is the true definition of a gentleman? This question is not easy to answer completely; but we will try.
First of all, a gentleman is not necessarily a man of wealth, or one who wears fine clothes. It is no question of outer circumstances or appearance; it is the inner nature that distinguishes the gentleman. There are men in the humblest walks of life who are nature's gentlemen. Without going into complicated analysis, however, we will try to give a general definition. The truest gentleman is the one who in his treatment of others comes nearest to exemplifying the “Golden Rule”. This practically includes all, for upon this rule, all rules of conduct and rules of etiquette, however worldly, are based.
Some common conceptions of a gentleman are these: a gentleman is always considerate for the feelings of others; he has tact, —he knows how to say and to do the right thing at the right time. He is a gentle man, —that is to say, he is quiet and refined in manner and speech; he does not unduly assert himself. True strength is not loud and boisterous; but quiet and subdued. The manner of a gentleman is characterized by that essence of good manners—repose.
A gentleman is never a tyrant or a bully; the rich upstart may treat servants and supposed inferiors with harshness or contempt; not so the gentleman. He is invariably courteous, alike to both high and low. He treats his servants with kindly consideration; he is not unduly familiar with them, and yet not coldly reserved. He shows appreciation of services performed for him, and shows it in a delicate and effective way.
In his speech a gentleman is revealed. The mode of expression, the tone and modulation of the voice, the choice of words, and certain other indefinable things distinguish him. He need not be a purist; he may use slang and use it freely; but he knows what slang to use and when not to use it. He need not be stiff and formal; he may speak and act on occasions with all the careless freedom of a youthful schoolboy; but he knows when to do so, and when not.