Luckily， there is a way to be happy. It involves changing the emphasis of our thinking from what we want to what we have. Rather than wishing your spouse was different， try thinking about her wonderful qualities. Instead of complaining about your salary， be grateful that you have a job. Rather than wishing you were able to take a vacation to Hawaii， think of how much fun you have had close to home. The list of possibilities is endless！ Each time you notice yourself falling into the "I wish life were different" trap， back off and start over. Take a breath and remember all that you have to be grateful. When you focus not on what you want， but on what you have， you end up getting more of what you want anyway. If you focus on the good qualities of your spouse， she' ll be more loving. If you are grateful for your job rather than complaining about it， you' ll do a better job， be more productive， and probably end up getting a raise anyway. If you focus on ways to enjoy yourself around home rather than waiting to enjoy yourself in Hawaii， you' ll end up having more fun. If you ever do get to Hawaii， you' ll be in the habit of enjoying yourself. And， if by some chance you don' t， you' ll have a great life anyway.
Make a note to yourself to start thinking more about what you have than what you want. If you do， your life will start appearing much better than before. For perhaps the first time in your life， you' ll know what it means to feel satisfied.
專注於我們想得到的，而不是我們所擁有的，這是我見過的一種最具普遍性和破壞性的心理趨向。我們擁有多少，似乎並無太大區別，我們欲望的清單不斷擴充，因而我們永遠得不到滿足。“當我實現了這個願望，就會快樂”。一旦這個欲望得到滿足，以後還會出現相同的欲求心理。
我們想要這個或那個。如果得不到，就會不斷地去想那些沒有的東西，總是感到不滿足。如果得到了，在新的條件下，我們又會產生同樣的心理。所以，盡管我們得到了，可還是不開心。如果我們一味地渴求新的欲望，將無法找到幸福。