W.Somerset Maugham
It is a dangerous thing to order the lives of others and I have often wondered at the self-confidence of politicians, reformers and suchlike who are prepared to force, upon their fellows measures that must alter their manners, habits, and points of view.I have always hesitated to give advice, for how can one advise another how to act unless one knows that other as well as one knows oneself? Heaven knows, I know little enough of myself: I know nothing of others.We can only guess at the thoughts and emotions of our neighbours.Each one of us is a prisoner in a solitary tower and he communicates with the other prisoners, who form mankind, by conventional signs that have not quite the same meaning for them as for himself.And life, unfortunately, is something that you can lead but once; mistakes are often irreparable, and who am I that I should tell this one and that how he should lead it? Life is a difficult business and I have found it hard enough to make my own a complete and rounded thing; I have not been tempted to teach my neighbour what he should do with his.But there are men who flounder at the journey’s start, the way before them is confused and hazardous, and on occasion, however unwillingly, I have been forced to point the finger of fate.Sometimes men have said to me, what shall I do with my life? And I have seen myself for a moment wrapped in the dark cloak of Destiny.
Once I know that I advised well.
I was a young man and I lived in a modest apartment in London near Victoria Station.Late one afternoon, when I was beginning to think that I had worked enough for that day, I heard a ring at the bell.I opened the door to a total stranger.He asked me my name; I told him.He asked if he might come in.
“Certainly.”
I led him into my sitting-room and begged him to sit down.He seemed a trifle embarrassed.I offered him a cigarette and he had some difficulty in lighting it without letting go of his hat.When he had satisfactorily achieved this feat I asked him if I should not put it on a chair for him.He quickly did this and while doing it dropped his umbrella.